Spencer's

Wandering around the mall I convinced husband we needed to at least visit the Spencer's. As we wandered through the all too small store, I stopped to gaze longingly at the fun little sex section. I fingered all the flavored lubes and massage oils and inevitably found myself drawn to the $14.99 purple rubber flogger that was hanging on the end cap. I immediately turned to husband and whipped his arm with it.

Nothing.

I tried again. Nothing.

I tried again.

"That kind of stings."

"Okay, do me."

He whipped my arm.

Nothing.

"Harder!"

Nothing.

"Harder!"

Nothing.

"HARDER! Are you afraid you're going to HURT me?!?"

A minor sting.

"I think I want that."

"You can get it."

"You probably won't use it on me."

"Maybe."

We walked out of the store to the car.

"You can get it next time if you really want it."

"I think I do. You know... if only to hang on the wall. But are you afraid you're going to bruise me or something?"

"Who could tell? You're one big bruise ANYWAY."

"True."