Credit where credit is due.

I've been exceptionally sick the last few days. Almost a whole week, actually. I missed two whole days of work which made me cringe since I work such long days and don't get sick leave. But I was seriously too ill to be there. It was bad. I'm finally just starting to recover from the 3 day 10# weight loss and subsequent weakness, dizziness, and general inability to do much. I suddenly understand a lot better the difficulty pro fighters go through when trying to "make weight." Except they lose all that weight and more within hours not days. Frightening.

As I finally started recovering, I found myself staying awake more. Given as much as I'd slept previously my schedule was seriously fucked up. Still is, actually. I think I got up about three times after 1am one morning and one of those times interrupted husband's masturbating. I wasn't about to help at all. My stomach was still tender and I was easily winded. I pretended not to notice as he pretended not to have been masturbating and I got my glass of water and went back to bed. Eventually, he came to bed and I decided to get up and masturbate for myself, it'd been at least a week.

A quick, but very delightful, orgasm later I sat in front of the computer feeling my body's wondering internal twinges of delight. Sated but not yet really tired I checked the blogs as I always do. Then I suddenly felt nostalgic for back when I was having regular, casual sex. I flipped back to the early days and read about some sex I had with Husband. And was suddenly sad. Husband's and my sex life has never been great. I hardly remember it even being a weekly event when we first married. However, there have been some times when we've had some really great sex. I hate to admit it to myself because it just makes me sad about what I'm missing, but Husband can be an amazing lover. There has been at least one time when he's absolutely blown me away with his ability to manipulate me and make me honestly beg for more, giving it in a way I'd never have expected from him.

I often don't give him enough credit. I have to admit it's particularly unforgivable when it's within the context of my blog that I can't even point to him and say he has proven himself quite capable of being my best lover of all. Because it's true. Not long after sleeping with Keith, husband took me into his arms one night and made me beg for his touch, arching and sighing and pulling him close because he made me feel thing I've never felt before with anyone. It was as if he read my mind and knew exactly what I needed. While Keith is the master of most things and with time and practice could learn to take me from intense desire to intense obsession, even with him it hadn't been like THAT.

Gah, I find myself sorely tempted to go wake up husband in a very, very delightful way....

Edited to add:

Scratch that. The man is terribly inhospitible to waking up and rolling the hell onto his back this morning. No surprises for him. Really, it's no wonder no one in this house gets laid.