It occured to me today that I spend most of my day looking at stuff. And paperwork. Not so much people. I deal with a fairly large number of people over a day and it occured to me, that despite the politeness of these particular people and my overall comfort with them, I still don't look people in the eye.
A young marine came in and asked me a question. I stared blankly at what he was holding and requested assistance from my manager who was better able to answer his question. The fact that I had to get assistance sort of forced me to look directly at him... and he was all things beautiful. Beautiful men please me. Also, he was ill which lent a slightly flushed quality to his face and extra brightness to his eyes. And I wanted to take him home to mother him... and then be thanked in that special naked way only beautiful naked marines know how. I assume. Because I've never actually slept with a marine of any sort, beautiful, naked, or otherwise.
Later on it occured to me that I was doing it again. In the middle of assisting a young seaman it occured to me that I hadn't looked at him yet. I forced myself to look up at him the next time I spoke and discovered he was looking at me. His gaze flicked quickly away and I thought "huh... was he actually... looking at me... for... a reason?!?" So then I was slightly pleased with myself. Because I'm easily pleased some days.
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