Recapping

So I've waited for something like a week for Curt to come back and see me again. He walked in around 1:30 while one of the vendor reps was in the store. He was talking to me. A lot. I wanted nothing more than for him to leave so I could talk to Curt who grabbed a water and brought it to me to ring up. I ignored the vendor in favor of him. "Were you just going to come in and not say anything?" I asked, pointedly. He smiled and said "I was going to say SOMETHING." "Right," I said, "I could tell by your silence." He smiled again. The vendor behind me interrupted forcing me to talk to him again. I finished the transaction with Curt and he told me "I have to go to PT." I frowned and asked far too plaintively, "will you come back?!?" "Maybe," he said as he left.

Unfortuantely, he didn't come back. At least not while I was still there. He was probably still in the gym when I got off work. I waited around in the store a while in the hopes that he'd show up but eventually forgot exactly why I was waiting so I left. Once I got outside I remembered again but by then it was too late and would have looked too pathetic for me to sit there in the hopes he'd show up. Especially if he hadn't planned to come back into the store.Maybe he'll show up some night this week.

The thing is, though, that when he came in I immediately started freaking out. My heart was pounding, adreneline... fight or flight, and I wanted to flee.

Sam came in a couple of days ago, too. I couldn't believe it. He walked in and said "hi" and it took me about a heartbeat to recognize him. "You're wearing funny colors," I told him, looking at his suddenly tan uniform. Turns out he's being sent to Iraq. We didn't have a long talk by any means. I told him I'm leaving, too. Right about the same time he is, oddly. Almost the same day. He bought his stuff and left. And I stood there in minor shock. I may never see him again but I'm still frightened by the idea of him going over there. I suspect that's where Nils is, now, too. And I believe Whit told me that's where he's going after this. Does my lust send people to Iraq?!?

I saw Whit a couple of days ago, too. I'll have to write about the sex I had with him.

And the sex I had with husband, too. I know. Can you believe it?