Haze

I wake up in the morning and drink something to help me be awake. I take a pill to keep me from being miserable with allergies for a while. During the day when I feel my energy hitting that unpleasant low that it always does... the one where my brain becomes fuzzy and I stop being able to count... I drink something else to bring me back to "normal". At the end of the night I take a pill to help me fall asleep. Day in and day out. My weekends I spend as much time blissfully asleep as I can. I'm stuck in this weird chemical rollercoaster and I'm not so sure it's good for me. Even though I LOVE my Monster KHAOS.

I can feel my hormones doing their thing. Before long I'm sure to bleed. But until then I get to enjoy the ups and downs of the emotions. Sam came in while I was talking to "the bitch" (this guy I like whom I think of affectionately as being "bitchy"). It was just before the store closed that Sam came in and I wanted nothing more than for The Bitch to leave. But he freakin' wouldn't. Ah, to be alone with Sam in the store... late in the evening. I'd have worked late for that, oh yes.

I worked out, thinking about Sam and gazing jealously as the cute redhead on the elliptical in front of me. "Bet she could nail him." Except actually, I think I'm cuter. She, however, had the sexier body. I figure she wins. I wonder what Sam's girlfriend looks like....

I managed to corner Hawk and get him to chat with me for a while. I love listening to Hawk talk because he's damned funny and he can go on for hours... and somehow manages to keep me interested. Plus, he was wearing a tank top and my eyes kept gliding left and right to check out his well muscled arms and chest. Dude's beautiful.... He said that he'd run earlier in the day, before I got there. "You know, you DO that and then what the hell am *I* supposed to do," I asked him crossly. He laughed, having no answer.

But it's certainly bedtime, before the drugs wear off and leave me wide awake and unable to sleep....