Spencer sent me some lame-ass excuse about taking too many tylenol pm's. What ever. I'm still bitter and angry about it. I gave it some thought today and decided that should I make the decision to continue to try to see him (and succeed and then start to see him more often) I'd surely end up regretting it because as Dr. Phil says (though I think he's not god, he gets it right now and again) the greatest predictor of future behavior is past behavior. So whatever. I'm done.
I ran into Nils at one of the gates today. I dropped husband off at work and as I was leaving I recognized him through the darkened glass of the booth. Yes, this is how much I long for the man. So when husband and I decided to go out to dinner (anything to make up for my disappointment over Spencer) I drove through that gate and said "hi" to him. Later on when I went back to the gym I made it a point to drive through the gate again and talk to him a few moments longer. Unfortunately, another car pulled up and I had to keep going. But it was so fucking nice to see him again.
Husband saw him and was NOT impressed. "He looks like that dispatcher guy from Super Troopers," he told me. Which surprised me because I really, really don't see the resemblence. But whatever. Husband added "I really had hoped you'd be talking about the OTHER guy, the one that checked our IDs..." because that guy is pretty cute... but really shy and I'm not into him. So, apparently overall husband was disappointed in my taste in men. However, I do still see the Bruce Willis thing in the guy. So I'm okay with it, anyway.
I did end up going to the gym, of course, since I was lacking in other more interesting forms of exercise. Namely, sex. Husband told me "you know, that burns a lot fewer calories than you think it does." To which I replied "maybe the way YOU do it...." Then we both laughed. I don't think I hurt his feelings with that one.
I added, "You know, the first month I was with The Ex I lost seven pounds." He asked if that was all sex to which I replied "well, no. He fed me a few times and we ate pretty healthy. Plus we were waaaay too busy to eat much anyway. But the sex was pretty athletic...." Which it was....
So now I'm wondering what a month with Keith would bring me. He's told me that if things between us are really good, again... if we get to see each other more than just the one time the second time he's going to buy me a collar. I'm vaguely confused as to what that means for him so I'm not really sure how to feel about it. Of course I'm miss submissive... but he tells me all the time about his desire to be topped and I've very much grown to appreciate the idea of topping him.. ordering him around and tying him up... whatever suits my fancy (and his). He's one of the very few guys I envision myself being really forward... really demanding... really... agressive with.... And I LIKE that.
Lastly, I finally got to see a photo of my gnomish fan. I've been communicating via e-mail with a fan of this blog (I know, hard to imagine someone liking my writing) which has been very amusing. He lives amazingly close by me but is married with a kid. And he takes all that shit seriously. Which I totally understand. It doesn't mean I LIKE it... but I GET it and I respect it, though I'd hate for him to know it. Although I guess he does, now. Damn. Anyway, he says it's not a very good photo but I'm impressed. If he's representative at all of my other readers I'm doing QUITE well for myself. I resent that the sexiest, most appealing guys around here are married or have girlfriends... and insist on being faithful. I mean, I get it. But I don't LIKE it.
So, yeah. Today was a bit of a bust. I'm tempted to go upstairs and try to force husband to make love to me... but I don't think I can handle yet another rejection tonight.
Oh, yeah. I heard from DJ again today, too. There was a small chance of getting together with him since Spencer flaked so completely and I wanted SOMEONE to make up for my crappy day. DJ was an EXCELLENT trade off. Especially since I've already seen him once. However, husband wanted to go to dinner at IHOP and we had the WORST service ever so after 45 minutes of waiting for our order we walked out and went elsewhere. Which ended up taking another 30 minutes beginning to end... and quick trip to the mall to buy me some extra workout clothes.... well... yeah... so I have to go to bed so I can get up in about 6 hours... so no chance of seeing DJ and I'm irritated about that, too. Because I was starting to look forward to it.
Bed calls, though....
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