Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Late last night...

Husband and I went to bed at the same time. I was tired but not exhausted. And despite my two orgasms I was still a little horny. Maybe not enough to have sex (well... okay.... I would have had sex given the chance). So as husband and I turned in I moved over to him (pushing past the dogs to reach him) kissing him goodnight. Except the lights were off. And I was horny... and suddenly in my head I was kissing Nils.

For a moment I considered that I could be kissing Keith but it somehow seemed so wrong to do that. And so I opted for imaginings of Nils and how I would kiss him in the darkness if he were in my bed. I let my hands wander up and down his body the same way I would have touched Nils, exploring his broad, masculine body....

But I was tired. And husband was not Nils, despite the passion and vividness of my fantasy. So I pulled away, although I could feel husband starting to respond.

I made my way back to my side of the bed and curled myself up ready to sleep. Husband cursed at the dogs and I asked him "what?"

"Ah, I just wanted to snuggle a little...."

I shrugged, "the dogs are snuggling, right? Goodnight." And that was that.

Yeah, maybe I did essentially turn him down for sex last night. Maybe that's what he was aiming for with his offering of a snuggle. But, in a lot of ways it feels like he's lost the right to even ask.

No comments: