Fantasy

I don't fantasize about anyone. Not ever, anymore. I think early on I learned that fantasizing about a lover (especially a potential lover) generally leads to disappointment. In fact it's gotten to the point where I rarely fantasize about anything anymore. I look back and remember experiences... relive them in my mind which is a form of fantasy... but I don't make things up, anymore. Not often.

I found myself fantasizing about Sam the other day. About having him at the store... me in his house (I've fantasized up the living room)... him leaning against me against a wall... his fingers sliding between my legs... two of them slidding inside my pussy curving back to press rhythmically against my gspot. That's all. Just feeling his breath... having him watch me as I react to the pressure....

Maybe because much as I can see that things with Sam have potential... but will likely never go anywhere, I can envision him like this. Touching me. Me touching him. It's exciting as hell.

Nils... Nils I used to think about him tying me up... tormenting me... punishing me somehow with a flogger or just his hand.... Just the idea... never really visualizing.

Keith... Keith I just remember. But he writes these amazing scenarios. So beautiful... so romantic... so ripe with potential. And I can see him there... the way his mouth would come down on mine....

Keith enourages me to fantasize, though I've so much forgotten how. But it's coming back to me. Just a bit....