Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The number

I'm sure I've written about this before. I'm also sure I have no new thoughts on the matter. But I guess the same "issues" run through my head now as years ago. Unresolved as ever. I was reading about the difference between the number of partners a man had versus a woman and what that difference means to the two people in that relationship.

And once again I find myself vaguely at a loss to know what to say about my own number. At this point I have to admit I can't really remember how many men I've been with. It's been years... and so many of those men were one or two night stands that weren't all that memorable. I remember the ones that really matter (for various reasons). If I were to count those I think my number would be something like five or six. I kind of don't feel like knowing my own number. At one time it was a matter of pride for me. But then, suddenly, I realized that I could give a shit how many (in gross) I've fucked but really only care about the number who were actually really worth remembering. And even then it's not about a "number" it's about those nights and with those men.

Then I started thinking about Husband's number. His is slowly, but steadily, growing. And while I can take an educated guess, I really just don't care.

So that's the numbers for you.