Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Aw yeah.

Nils came in but we didn't have much to say to one another. I try not to flirt in front of my coworkers so I held off and he and I barely talked. Had he come in just five minutes later she would have been long gone but noooooooooo....

So the day went on and I flirted with a customer here and there and convinced myself that Sam wasn't going to come in. Because you know... he's Sam and he does what he wants. Or something.

And there I am ringing up a customer when he walks in the door. His head immediately swivels to check the register... and why yes... I AM there, handsome. He raised his eyebrows at me twice. I'm sure that's the poor man's version of a wink. It certainly made my stomach flip like a wink would.

But of course I ignored him as he retrieved his coffee and wandered closer. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to think of his looking at the magazines as my invitation to chat, but that's what it's become. So I asked him, again, if he did anything exciting on his four day weekend. "Nope," he told me. "I didn't leave the house once the entire time-- well, I did go to Walmart one day. Just to get out." I was surprise, "wow, I really though you'd come up with something to do. You didn't do ANYTHING. Geez." I stared at him for a moment, "I did do something, but I can't remember what. Which makes it sound more exciting than it was. Except it wasn't." I thought some more and added, "I joined an online poker site and did pretty well. Although this morning I logged on and lost like... 400 points." "So long as it isn't money," he told me. I nodded, "No, I think if it were money I'd be more freaked out about it."

At this point a couple of customers came in, interrupting the conversation. So I ended up talking to them for a bit. Teasing them about something and just generally being a good "host." As I was conversing with them I suddenly thought about a conversation I had with Keith and about the fact that he thinks I'm more social than perhaps I think I am. And he might just be right. I might need to change my view on myself. Regardless, I was rather proud of myself for chatting up these two people I'd never met before.

Meanwhile, Sam STAYED. He waited for the two people to leave and then asked me, "so... did you browse any OTHER websites this weekend?" giving me a knowing look. I laughed and thought about the time I spent online this weekend. Perusing the adult personals, looking up photos of naked and half naked guys trying to find one that looks most like Sam, reading sex blogs, writing in my sex blog... nothing I really felt like I should repeat. "I... um... yeah," I finally said, "but nothing I should really talk about." I thought about it for another long second while he gave me his smile, "But it's not like... well... you know... I'm trying to keep it from sounding as bad as it does but... it just is... but... ah... crap." I think he said something then but I was really trying hard to think of something INNOCENT I'd visited all weekend... and just couldn't come up with anything.

Finally I just up and asked him, trying to sound kind of casual, "aren't you married?" To which he replied "no." I stared at him, honestly surprised, "really? I thought you were." He shook his head. Bingo. I got the answer I was looking for.

I think I changed the subject again and then my boss came waltzing in and ruined everything. "Ah, my boss is here," I said giving him a long suffering look. So he took his leave. Just before he walked out the door I asked him "will you be back?" "You're always closed when I get done working out," he responded. I smiled, "I meant this week?" He nodded, "I'll be back tomorrow." I smiled, thrilled. "Good, I'll be looking forward to it." He smiled back and left.

So at this point there can be no real doubt that he KNOWS I want him. And he apparently returns the interest. Fucking AWESOME. My fear is that he really doesn't realize I'm married and mostly just want him for an erotic interlude. Or maybe he does. And maybe that'd be cool with him, too. I was seriously waiting for an opportunity to tell him that I think he's way smokin' hot but that chance never came tonight. Not even remotely. Maybe tomorrow....

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